No matter what.. He leave a hard footprint in my heart..


Met up with him at bliss cafe just now~

It was a peaceful night out~ With not much talking but lots of pondering..

I passed him back his stuffs but he only took back the watch he won during d&d..

I wana gave him back the pda that i bought for him but he asked me to keep for myself as i need it for work more than him..

I gave him back his sup cards but he asked me to keep it first cause he had already paid for it this year.. He said ,"keep it for urgent use.. Dont be silly, just return me the $ if u used it~ I dont meant anything.. Or when u got to apply for one then return me.."

I tried to hold back my tears.. i really dont deserve such treatment from him anymore.. I really dont want him to treat me that nice..

Look at his injured leg and sick body.. I dont know what i have done..

His frame became even smaller..

He doesnt look like the andy i always know anymore~ He became very quiet and no matter how i urge him to join his friends for tea so that he wont think so much, he just wont.. He dont know what to say or explain when peeps ask him about our things..

Hes like a hermit crab now.. Hiding in his empty shell..

Its all my fault.. Please dont ask him anything anymore~

I doesnt want him to waste any time on me as time wait for no man~ I cant assure him that he will be the one i married, so i dont wana hinder his happiness..

I dont want any regrets in my life.. If i dont put down this stone now how am i suppose to know if i can find the 1 i want.. I truly believe i'm selfish but we only live once..

Hes the greatest guy i ever met~ And i'm the worst choice he ever made.. If we didnt start, nothing of this will happen..

I dont how to make him strong again.. I tried to be blunt and super harsh but still.. I failed..

I really hope he can find a girl with better temper, personality and character.. Who doesnt get tired of things easily..

My heart really shrunk and sunk to the bottom.. i'm not sure if that is love or charity.. I dont wana see him hurt but i dont wana force myself to do things that i dont feel like doing.. If can, i really wana take back my words and treat it as nothing happen.. But i know my heart will wander off after some time again..

If only i'm not that obstinate..

I believed a crack line still exist from a broken vase.. Be it anything, trust and communication is important.. Maybe we just lacked of it~

I sound ironical~ But its really no one fault~

I wished what i had done is right.. Beside, hes looking for a married partner but i'm still looking for my Mr right.. We didnt stand on the same line..

Now i know why love is selfish and blind.. I really hope hes the one to hurt me than me the one to hurt him in the end..

Why can my love just turn blend like that..

Haizzz..

If thats the way to make me guilty and bad, he succeeded.. I'm feeling shit..

I just wished to concentrate on my career now..

I'm truly and deeply sorry..

I will still protect him from far and from being hurt..

If these were the reasons everyone wants~ I've given everything~ No more questions and answers from him..




*PROOF*